My Story as a Living Donor
By James Muscat
James’ Story – A Gift From Within
My name is James. I see myself as a down-to-earth person with a simple purpose in life: to be happy and to make others happy in my own simple ways.
This is my story…
My brother-in-law, Dave, was diagnosed with end-stage renal failure. For those who are not familiar with kidney disease, patients with kidney failure may need to spend many hours, three times a week, connected to a dialysis machine to keep them alive. David was one such patient.
We did not even share the same blood type, and yet we were compatible, with our tissue type being described as a “near perfect match”.
On 25 February 2004, Dave and I went into surgery for the first unrelated living kidney transplant ever to be performed in Malta.
For me, this donation was a dream come true. I wanted to give something from within, and I was determined right from the very start. A series of medical tests was carried out over a number of months to ensure that the operation could proceed safely. With the support of my family, the expertise of our consultants, the efforts of the Renal Unit and, above all, with the help of the Lord, the kidney transplant was performed.
This was precisely my dream — a dream that came true. I am no hero, as many suggested. I am simply a guy who was inspired to share and to give. Yes, I feel proud and honoured. I feel good from within, and I am grateful to God for having given me the opportunity to give a little something from within me.
Such sentiments cannot be fully expressed in words. Life is truly fragile and short, but it is also very precious. Life is more than just living. There are certain events in our lives that become a catalyst for change.
This is the story of one of those events, which had an impact on my life and the lives of my family. It is a simple story, but one that has touched the hearts of many.
My family, like so many others in Malta, is very close-knit. Family is a priority and, in spite of life’s obstacles and difficulties, we remain united.
But what really made me decide to give up a kidney?
To begin with, I could not bear to see Dave hooked up to a machine for so many hours every single week. I wanted to improve his quality of life and see him live as normal a life as possible. Dave had undergone so many surgical interventions prior to the transplant that his body was quickly deteriorating, and I wanted to put a stop to this. I dreamt of seeing Dave sitting around with his family rather than in hospital surrounded by tubes and catheters.
My decision to become a living kidney donor was actually one of the easiest I ever made. I broke the news to David during Christmas. It was a gift from within — a gift of no monetary value, a simple gift, but one destined to improve my buddy’s life and that of his family.
I still remember the intensive tests we had to go through and the anxieties we felt before the operation. But let me share one little experience that will remain in my memory for as long as I live.
After the many hours of surgery, David was taken into the Intensive Therapy Unit and I was taken to my ward. I was still in a haze and under the influence of anaesthesia, but I can recall very vividly that when my family greeted me, all I could utter was:
“What a wonderful feeling.”
It is a feeling that has remained with me — a feeling of joy and warmth that is very difficult to explain in words. I was simply elated, and this was evident in my smile despite the pain and discomfort.
My family gives me reason to live. I rejoice with them in their successes and share the agony of their setbacks.
I have another dream in life. I dream of a future that fulfils the goals and aspirations of those closest to me — my own family, my mum and dad, my three brothers and their wives, and also my sister and David. To all of them, I promise my endless support, especially when times get tough.
One of my objectives in life is to make people smile. I simply love to see others happy, and I pray that when my time is up, no matter how many mistakes I may have made in my life, I will still bring a smile to others when they think of me as James — the simple guy who enjoyed giving and sharing.
Our Transplant Coordinator at the time - Mr Tony Bugeja, was a driving influence throughout the journey leading up to the operation. I thank Tony for helping to make the process possible. I thank our surgeons for doing an excellent job, and the nurses for caring for us after surgery. I thank my parents and all my family for supporting me every step of the way. I thank my wife Carmen, my two boys and my foster child for standing by me.
I also thank the Lord for giving me the courage to make the decision to give the gift of sharing from within.
Giving something to somebody and expecting nothing in return is an experience that unites us in a very special way. It is truly a celebration of selfless love — giving a part of oneself so that another person may benefit from a new lease of life.
Undoubtedly, the greatest gifts of all are Love and Life. Many years have passed since the transplantation. David will always be my kidney buddy, and I thank him for being part of my life. Some people still ask me why I did it. The answer is simple: I did it out of love.
Some people ask me how I feel. I feel better than ever before and, if I could, I would do it all over again. To reach out, to make a dream possible, to give from within and to share makes me the happiest guy on this planet.
Alfred, a heart recipient, added heaps of inspiration to my life and, through our involvement with the Transplant Support Group, he helped me reinforce my sentiments about sharing. Like Alfred, I too was dying before going into surgery — dying to give my kidney, because I could not wait to see this dream of mine come true.
Life is beautiful. It becomes even more meaningful when we share and give.
Whatever you give today, or think or say or do, will multiply tenfold and then return to you.
Think about it, dear colleagues, donor buddies and transplantees, and you will realise that giving and receiving unite us all in a very unique way.
God bless you, now and always.
